Musings on Art and Fear Frustration
I decided to start reading Art and Fear again – it’s one of those books that I pick up from time to time. I do think the title is all wrong though. I am not afraid of success, but rather get frustrated at the snails pace of my journey. And, I suppose success is a subjective term here – it means different things to different people.
The authors write:
“At some point the need for acceptance may well collide head-on with the need to do your own work. It’s too bad, since the request itself seems so reasonable: you want to do your own work, and you want acceptance for that. It’s the ballad of the cowboy and the mountain man, the myth of artistic integrity and Sesame Street: sing the song of your heart, and sooner or later the world will accept and reward the authentic voice. Jaded sophisticates laugh at this belief, but usually buy into it along with everyone else anyway.In the non-art world, this belief system is a driving mechanism behind the American Dream – and the Mid-Life Crisis. In the art work, it’s a primary buffer against disillusionment.”
Here’s what I think: Art (or at least ceramic art) is not an inexpensive venture. I want success – financial, personal and peer recognition. There I said it out loud. Without these things, I start thinking that I need to get a “real job”. I was thinking about this yesterday. Why do I want to work for someone else and why do I work harder for others than for myself? The answer? The paycheck is guaranteed! One might even be rewarded for being the employee of the month, aka recognition, and at the end of the day I feel good because I’m not fretting about the bills and can sit back and enjoy the evening.
I’m really trying not to whine here and hope it’s not coming off as such. I am simply trying to understand myself better. This is really an a-ha moment for me and hope it reads as such. One thing I’ve learned about myself. I talk a lot about what I’m going to do and don’t always act on my plans. In the next week, I am going to polish my artist statement and get my portfolio in order to send out to various galleries. I am also going to submit some images to Lark Books for their 500 Plates, Platters and Chargers book coming out in 2008. (Ceramic artists- postmark deadline is July 18th.) And finally, I am going to continue to make work for my Etsy Shop
I am currently working on a special request for someone who saw my work on Flickr a few weeks ago. David is an avid gardener and a former art/art history lecturer who lives in Michigan. He was attracted to my pieces where I created texture using the “shellac and subtract” method of decorating my work with ginkgo leaves and honeysuckle vines. Here’s the progress so far:
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Meanwhile, we enjoyed the fireworks at Washington Park yesterday and got caught in the rain – not quite as romantic as the song implies. On a side note, the park looks like it’s suffering from a massive hang over right now – abandoned grills, sporting equipment, clothing, assorted cardboard boxes that once contained beer and who knows what else. Apparently we weren’t the only ones to get caught.
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jafabrit
July 5, 2007 at 9:44 pm //
I don’t take your thoughts on your blog as whining, but an open exploration. I can’t speak for others, but I appreciate the candor.
The fireworks had JUST finished and then it poured. We were soaked down to our undies by the time we walked home. Everyone was laughing and enjoying it though (children and adults alike).
How’s the doll coming along (have you had time?). I am working on the head and the arms. Will post a progress pic soon I think.
Mary Timme
July 6, 2007 at 12:38 am //
I didn’t feel you were whining at all, C. I think everyone who does art of most kinds finds this waiting on the commission or the profit from the sale a very wearing thing. I was working at the front desk of our church today and answering the phones and a young woman who is a sculpturess (I think that’s how I’d say it!) was talking about this very thing.
I happen to love your work and I’m so glad someone else (with credentials?!) likes it too! Yea! for C. I feel differently now that I’m in ‘retirement’ than I did when I was teaching and selling in galleries, but I think we as arty people all want the same general thing as you expressed so well.
Shawn McCann
July 6, 2007 at 4:00 am //
From someone who has a regular full-time job and also a full art career, I totally know where you are coming from with your thoughts. To be free to create without using your energy on someone else’s work is something that I hope to attain sometime in the near future. As long as you keep dedicated to what you believe in and push, you will keep growing not only as an artist, but hopefully from a financial standpoint as well. The struggle is the sign of a true artist!
LB
July 6, 2007 at 4:24 am //
Success is a very subjective term. I once told someone (whose piece didn’t place in a contest) that if they continue to create for themselves, they will always be a winner. And, I truly believe that… Thank you for sharing your thoughts=;)
HMBT
July 6, 2007 at 10:36 am //
You are not whinning…just expressing what we are all feeling as struggling artists. Making any kind of art is not cheap…not even close and just to stay afloat in art supplies is hard enough…then add in the marketing, the sales…it can be overwhelming sometimes. OY!
Janvangogh
July 6, 2007 at 12:02 pm //
That is a good book.
I dont think you are whining.
Your persistence will pay off. I know that is kind of a pat response but I have to believe that it is true. I think of all the opportunities I have probably missed because I may not have been persistent enough — ie, I let small roadblocks stop me.
Cynthia
July 6, 2007 at 3:52 pm //
The doll is coming along nicely, Jafabrit- I just made the feet and am going to make the hands today- then start in on the body…It was so weird when it started raining after the 4th – the fireworks had just ended and then mother nature’s began – we were totally caughte off guard and were also soaked to the bone and it felt good too.
I guess it is sort of universal, Mary – which is why I talk about it I suppose. Put it out there in the universe and I find out I’m not alone – which is somehow oddly comforting.
Shawn, thanks for sharing your viewpoint – I admire your work – and think you are fortunate to find work in an art related field, though I’m sure you would prefer doing you’re own thing. It puts it in perspective a little more for me.
Thanks lb – it is subjective and I guess the moral is to keep on going even when slowing down or quitting sounds appealing.
I think that’s exactly that, Heather – all the other stuff is draining and I have to put a different kind of hat on. Make art carefree and with abandon, market work with business savy and constraint. 2 opposing worlds.
Not really a pat answer Janet – good things are happening for you now as a result of putting yourself out there. I admire that you’re willing to try new things.
Franx Budi
July 7, 2007 at 10:54 am //
Your blog is quite good and artistic. Good luck and success