We helped my husband celebrate his 43 birthday last Monday – his chosen place of celebration was the Cherry Cricket, home to the best burger in town (maybe even the nation). Their tap menu doesn’t stink either. It wasn’t a huge milestone type birthday, but a birthday nonetheless. I’ll let you in on a little family secret – my husband and I don’t exchange gifts for birthdays, Christmas, Valentine’s Day or other “holidays”. Before you start feeling sad for me, don’t – we decided long ago when money was tighter, that we’d rather spend the money ear marked for a gift to go out to a fancy diner. Well, times have changed but, old habits die hard. We still don’t exchange gifts and we still go out to eat. The Cherry Cricket isn’t fancy – but it was his birthday after all.
We do exchange cards – and I either look for the cheesiest around or something that makes you go “hmmm”. Well, my birthday is just next week – so I guess when I chose a card with this phrase (see above) on it, I was thinking of myself. I haven’t stopped thinking about how old I would be if I didn’t know how old I was. I certainly, don’t want to relive and relearn everything. I really feel like I’m on a roll right now. My husband chose age 25 as his ideal age. I would choose youth if I could keep what I know now intact. I was certainly healthier and more youthful looking.
Meanwhile, I caught a little Deepak Chopra on PBS last night. The talk was titled, The Happiness Prescription and I was drawn in. I originally turned on the TV to watch a little mindlessness – to tune out. I didn’t want to think about anything, but of course, I started thinking about everything.
Statistically, Americans are some of the least happy people in the world – and that doesn’t exclude the wealthy. So what’s his answer to achieve happiness? Choose one: drugs, cognitive therapy or meditation. Some people are blissfully, ignorantly happy with their lives. A good many of us are, however, saddled with “existential suffering” – that feeling of “is this it?” I’m not ranting or anything here – just thinking out loud.
Things have been turning around for me in the past year – maybe I’ve unwittingly happened upon some of what Deepak talks about in his show. Problems have become opportunities, I’m reaching out to others, I’m really trying hard to be non-judgmental among other actions. Now, I’m not really tooting my own horn here – I’m feeling a sense of wonderment that I’m experiencing life on my own terms. It has all been a long, long process that is just starting to manifest after leaving my airline job and feeling a little lost 7 years ago.
So, on Monday, I will celebrate my 42nd birthday and to answer my original question, I would be the age that I am now. How about you?
Have a good weekend,
~Cynthia
13 Responses to “Little of this, little of that…”
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Yo! Cynthia
Happy Birthday! (A couple of days early.)
What age? Dunno. I had a pretty good childhood, full of the magic of fireflies, swimming + horseback riding. Starting at about age 6-7 would be ok but only, as you say, with the acquired knowledge gained in this lifetime!
Favorite show on Thurs. nights is: Eli Stone. (On ABC i think – Channel 5 here.) Bar none, i think it’s the best program on the networks. Second choice is: Men In Trees.
So! You didn’t tell us what your favorite restuarant is! Which one will you pick for your celebration?
Hugs + have the greatest day
Chae
Happy Birthday to you both! Have you decided where you want to dine for your birthday?
Interesting that this post appears now. I talked to an very old friend the other day. A Hopi elder that says he was born before they kept good time on the reservation. I figure he`s 85-90 or so, judging by the ages of his 10 children. Wolf says he likes not knowing his true age, because he`ll never know when he`s the right age to die.
Happy Birthday young lady.
Happy Birthday to you both. I would not have thought Americans are the least happy! No wonder they go on about it so much. I don’t know about my age, but having had such early sadness and trauma growing up I would say I am a generally very happy person and living life to the fullest
Part of that is because I don’t take what I have today for granted, and I life it just too short to sweat the small stuff.
I have seen some wonderful things happen for you this last year, like a blossoming. May there be more for you.
all the best
corrine
How convenient to have coincident birthdays! I’ll be the big five-oh late this year, so age is on the mind more than usual. Like so many others of my Boomer gen., I have no idea what age I really am and can’t figure out how in the heck I got here!
Life with my two little kids, who are six and five years old, does put a much younger perspective on things. Except, of course, when someone asks, “Your grandkids?”
Happy birthday, you two youngsters!
Thank you Chae & Chi – I’m choosing some kind of Thai meal for my birthday bash, much to the disappointment of my husband. But, it’s my day!
That’s funny you say that John, my MIL is originally from Mexico and she has 2 birthdays. They didn’t keep good records in her hometown either and when she applied for a passport and visa to come to the US, she gave an estimate as to her age, based on what her family remembered. She thinks she’s a different age – we celebrate both sometimes.
I can tell you do live life to the fullest, Corrine – I’m sure we’d be good friends if we lived in the same town! Thank you too…
Casey – Yes, it’s convenient and we often get joint gifts and visits from family. I remember how I got to this point, what a windy curvy path it’s been, but it’s all happened so fast and slow at the same time. Having kids will certainly put things in perspective forcing one to look at life just a little bit differently.
I understood the question completely differently – not what age would I prefer to be, but what age do I feel I am? If I didn’t know my true age I would be very confused – people tell me I look like I’m in my 20’s, but my aching body makes me feel like I’m in my 80’s!
I wouldn’t be younger. It is a long road to get to my age of almost 67 and I wouldn’t do a step of it over. If you’d asked yesterday, I was notified you had a new set up this morning, I would have said, Argh! I was angst filled yesterday and as is usual it was my own doing but I do it in such tiny baby steps that I don’t notice until all of a sudden. I think life is like that. You go along with everyday and then . . .big suprise, you’ve gotten yourself to a spot you don’t like. More choice. Ah, but you can always change it. Until death, you always can change something. I say that having looked death in the eyes 3 different times. Death is not so much to be feared as it is a living well in our circumstances that makes a real life, I think.
BTW, HB & SLTT
Undaunted – I read the question the same way. I think a part of my choice is the physical which longs for a younger body, but then the mental – I don’t really wax nostalgic about age 18 or anything.
Mary – your post is sort of cryptic. I hope everything is okay with you? You are right – we all have the power of choice. Everyday, we make decisions that can alter our path. and, thank you…
Cyn, a very, very Happy Birthday to both your husband and you!! Both my husband and I are getting older, but I wouldn’t want to turn back the pages of time for anything. I do wish I still had the body I did when I was about 27 though, to be honest LOL! I turned 54 in February, yikes! Honestly, when I look back, for some reason turning 40 was more traumatic to me than turning 50! I’m still trying to figure that one out!
My body feels older than my mind does. When I turned 25, I thought of myaelf as almost 30 for 5 years. So I never was 26, 27, 28 or 29. Now I have to stop and do subtraction to remind myself.
Your success this year has been the result of alot of effort and hard work. I am impressed with your tenacity.
Happy Birthday to you and to your husband. Dinner out is a good idea instead of exchanging gifts. Time together is much more important.
Lynette – I experienced more angst turning 30 than 40. In fact, I welcomed 40 with open arms. 50 might be a different story – or maybe not. Happy belated birthday to you!
I hear you Janet – my body is starting to feel like maybe I can’t do everything I used to without thinking about it. Heck, gardening makes me sore
Thank you for the birthday wishes, and I agree with you time is irreplaceable.
Cynthia,
I think I would be 5-years-old. I still love to lay out in the grass and gaze up at the clouds, I love to blow bubbles, and butterflies always illicit an “Ahhh!” from me